By Mary Watkins
Many people wonder what goes on in a therapy session and how it works; and it’s not like in the
films! In this blog I will try to explain and reassure that although it can seem mysterious, it is about
two people sitting in a room; me, the counsellor and the other, the client who is experiencing some
kind of distress in their life.
After someone has made contact with me either through email or phone call, I arrange a time and
day that is suitable for both of us. Before the appointment, I send directions to my counselling room
in Blackwood and details of how to pay and am always happy to answer any questions that may arise
before our first session. The day comes, you reach my counselling room in Blackwood full of
trepidation and anticipation, maybe wondering how you are going to speak to this person you’ve
never met before. You press the intercom for my room, I answer and come to the door to meet you.
Once you are settled comfortably in my counselling room, the first thing I do is to explain that
whatever you tell me is in confidence, although there are limits to that confidence, which I would
explain further. Once this has been completed the work of counselling commences.
People come to counselling for many reasons; anxiety, panic attacks, health anxiety, intrusive
thoughts, work problems, bereavement, anything that is making them feel depressed, unhappy and
sometimes frozen with fear.
The problem could be big or small but the important thing is to have the chance to speak out loud
about what is causing the anxiety, distress and unhappiness, without fear of being judged, made to
feel silly or shut down. In some ways counselling is mysterious in the way it works; the client and
counsellor look for clues about what is going on and maybe look at patterns from the past that are
still being repeated and affecting them now. It’s a wonderful moment when a client discovers a
different perspective and understanding about their problem and even more wonderful is the
realisation that by talking, they have discovered their own answers.
People often ask ‘will counselling change the way I feel?’ There is no certainty but many people
report feeling lighter after their first session. They also report feeling energised or even exhausted;
hard work is in progress and it can be overwhelming at times. Counselling is a process and being
committed to attending sessions on a weekly basis at first, seems to produce the best results. If you
find yourself feeling reluctant to attend your sessions, it’s important to ask yourself why? Are painful
feelings being discussed, are things moving too quickly? If you feel this, don’t be afraid to discuss
these feelings with your counsellor.
When we are in pain, physical or mental, we want to make things better for ourselves as soon as
possible. Change can be painful and progress slow, as humans we tend to stay with the familiar even
if it is no longer serving us. Progress can be difficult to measure on a weekly basis, I find it’s best
reflected on after several sessions and comparing how you feel now to how you felt in your first
session. Attending counselling is a time to be patient and gentle with yourself whilst you build new
foundations, which will hopefully lead to a better understanding of yourself, and help you live the
life you want.
I hope this explains and reassures you about the ‘mystery of the counselling session.’ Yes, you may
feel apprehensive and a bit scared before the first session, that’s natural. Please be assured that you
will receive a warm welcome and that I will help you to feel at ease.
Counselling could be an investment in your future self, so if you are ready to take that first step, or
maybe it’s a leap.
You can contact me via my profile.
